Covid Drives Creative Cremation Memorials

Planning funerals and memorials has been difficult during the year of COVID-19. Restrictions placed on gatherings has limited traditional ways to grieve, while technology has opened new pathways. Take a look at some of the ways memorials have changed in the past year — and some creative solutions.

Funeral Changes During Covid

You want to memorialize your loved ones and gather to celebrate their lives — but that’s hard when your state makes it impossible to gather in large groups. As a result, many funeral directors have had to pivot and learn how to live stream funerals. You can expect to attend more live-streamed memorial services in the future, as many people appreciate the ability to pay their respects without having to incur travel time and costs.

Another big change? Cremations have more than increased dramatically during the past year. This occurred for many reasons. Funeral homes often didn’t have the capacity to store remains until families could gather for funerals, and some people feared that they would be exposed to COVID-19 through their deceased loved ones or those in attendance. In addition, as people counted their pennies through the pandemic, they began to realize the considerable cost advantages of commemorating a loved one’s life through cremation rather than burial. So many have simply put the memorial gathering on hold until it is ok to travel and gather. The lack of ritual has caused survivors to yearn for a connection and reach for physical ways to memorialize the lost loved one. Cremation memorials are a solution to this gap in tradition.

Cremation Solutions Bring Creativity to Your Memorials

Loved One LauncherCremation allows so many creative ways to memorialize a loved one. That’s where we come in. At Cremation Solutions, we create innovative art and jewelry that provides you with a unique way to remember and treasure your loved one. Our personalized cremation urns are designed to preserve special memories. Take a look at some of the on trendy ways to commemorate your loved one.

Glass Keepsakes And Jewelry

Cremation GlassGlass has a sense of the eternal to it because of the way we see through it or see ourselves reflected in it. And glass shares something with cremation — both involve extremely high temperatures. Our artisans take this opportunity to turn grief into something truly beautiful.

Glass Sculpture with Cremation AshesBecause molten glass requires temperatures over 2000°F, far hotter than most cremations, our artists are able to incorporate cremation ashes into the molten glass as an artwork is in progress. The carbon from the ashes burns off at this ultra high temperature, leaving behind brilliant white ashes incorporated right into the glass keepsakes and jewelry with infused ashes. Crystalized glass can even be cut into brilliant gem style of high end jewelry!

Click Here For Our Full Selection of Crystals Made From Ashes
Crystal Gems Made From Ashes

Choose tributes in an array of natural colors emerald green to blue like “His Eyes”. We offer a wide variety of glass sculptures and keepsakes to memorialize your loved one in a unique, one-of-a-kind way.

 

Fingerprint Jewelry

Thumbies KeepsakesWhat’s more unique than your fingerprint? Drawing on this, we create absolutely one-of-a-kind necklaces, charms, and pendants that feature your loved one’s fingerprint, so you can hold their identity close to your heart. Of course we keep all fingerprints completely secure.

These unusual keepsakes are also ideal to capture special moments such as the birth of a baby, a wedding, or a special bond between two people. We can incorporate birthstones into the finger jewelry and offer a range of designs to help you begin your own family tradition. And yes, we can make this unique jewelry using the paw print or even the nose print of your cherished pet.

Pandora-style Cremation Jewelry

Beads made with ashesIf you already love your Pandora bracelet or necklace with its delightful charms that show off who you are and what you love, now you can add your loved ones to the mix. At Cremation Solutions, we make Pandora-style beads that you can add to your existing jewelry to include your loved ones as part of the story of your life.

Choose from a gold or sterling silver beat that holds a small amount of your loved one’s ashes, discreetly sealed with a tungsten/stainless steel countersunk screw. Or add some colorful beauty with a custom-made glass bead that holds a tiny amount of your loved one’s ashes, seamlessly infused into the glass during its creation. Either way, you can carry your loved one with you everywhere you go.

Cremation Monuments

Monuments For Cremation
Examples of cremation monuments for the yard or garden. These rock solid memorials will keep your loved one’s ashes safe and secure from the elements.

If you want to honor your loved one in a more traditional way, perhaps as part of a family memorial at your local cemetery, you may want to consider our cremation headstones, niches, columbaria, and other memorials. These customized monuments hold your loved one’s cremated ashes or urns inside with a sense of dignity and permanence. Choose handsome monuments with plenty of space for you to write a special commemorative message, or opt for hollowed out boulders that return your loved one to nature in a beautiful, organic way.

The Loved One Launcher Ash-Scattering Cannon

If the loved one you’re celebrating went through life making a strong impression, say farewell with the same kind of zest they showed throughout their life. The Loved One Launcher is a powerful and joyous way to express the impact someone had on your life, and it’s ideal for life celebration parties surrounding someone who evoked love and laughter in your circle of friends.

With the Loved One Launcher, instead of passively scattering ashes on the ground, you can shoot them 70′ into the air — accompanied by confetti and streamers, if you like. This robust ash-scattering cannon creates a beautiful spectacle that can only make you smile even as you mourn your loss.

Scattering Urns

Turn your ash-scattering ceremony into something very special with an urn that fits the personality of your loved one and that you can leave behind. If you’re scattering ashes at sea or in a body of water, we have special urns that float beautifully and then biodegrade with no harm to the environment.

Biodegradable Urns For Water
Some Urns Are Biodegradable and Float Before They Descend and Dissolve Releasing The Ashes
Scattering At Sea
Biodegradable Turtle Urn

If you choose to scatter ashes on the land, choose from urns made of salt, sand, gelatin, and other biodegradable urn materials, including urns that you can bury. We also have beautiful urns available to hold ashes on display and following the scattering the urn converts into a memorial birdhouse!

Scattering Urn into Birdhouse
Grandpa’s Memorial Birdhouse

However you choose to commemorate your loved one, at Cremation Memorials, we are ready to help you find the right way. Contact us today to plan a beautifully creative memorial that will help you treasure your loved one’s memory forever.

Traditional Funerals
REMEMBER THIS!

Has Covid-19 Increased The Cremations In The USA?

Cremation Solutions

The novel coronavirus, which was detected in the metropolitan area of Wuhan in China’s central Hubei province, continues to infect people around the world, including the United States. Since its discovery in late December, COVID-19, the respiratory disease caused by coronavirus, has infected over 3 million individuals, resulting in over 215,000 fatalities all over the world. While Spain, Italy, France, and the UK have posted over 20,000 deaths each, the US has recorded over 1 million coronavirus cases, a third of the world’s total infections, and over 57,000 deaths. That has put pressure on funeral homes and crematories across the country. Funeral homes are having to adjust to delays and the sadness of low attended funerals.

In New York, the hardest-hit state by the pandemic, there have been over 17,000 COVID-19-related deaths from a total of 295,137 infections. However, New York City has been the epicenter of the disease in the state, recording over 162,000 cases and 11,708 deaths as of Tuesday, March 28. While state administrations and health officials report that the number of fatalities has reached the backside of the death curve, funeral-home and crematory workers, whose duty is to ensure the dead are laid to rest respectfully, say they have never been busier.

Misinformation About Cremation Orders by the Government

Delayed FuneralsAs America continues to grapple with the pandemic, several images and reports on social media offer misguided information about what happens after people die from coronavirus. One particular image went viral, telling people that once a person is deceased, they become the government’s property and will be incinerated without wakes or funeral services.

The report has elicited contradicting responses from state agencies, medical examiners, and funeral directors. The NY Funeral Directors Association responded to the matter, saying: “We haven’t seen or heard of such claims. Funeral Homes in the state are still operating under the state guidelines.” Additionally, the New York State Department of Health noted that funeral homes, crematories, and cemeteries, being essential businesses, were allowed to remain operational, despite other non-essential businesses remaining closed. The deceased require a proper send-off, complete with a wake, structured funeral, and burial. Nonetheless, funeral homes will be required to adhere to social distancing and only allow a limited number of attendees during these gatherings.

Funeral Homes Forced to Turn Away Grieving Families, Suggesting Cremation

Cremation BoxesWith the increasing number of deaths in the US continue to surge, the demand for funeral services has drastically spiked. Many funeral homes have exceeded their capacities, with some caskets lying in unsuitable areas such as the lobbies and corridors. For instance, the Funeral Director at Lawrence H Woodward Funeral Home in Brooklyn, Kendall Lindsay, said, “By the end of March, we had over 120 planned funeral services. As of April 5, the number had increased to 127. We are now compelled not to register any new cases because of the dwindling storage space.”

Throughout the city, staffs in mortuaries, morgues, and funeral homes continue to scramble and find space for new COVID-19-related deaths. “We currently have bodies that cannot be buried now. We will have to postpone the funeral services and hold them after at least one week or more,” said Lindsay, who was forced to turn away 20 families, leaving them with no other option but to cremate their loved ones with no wakes or proper funeral arrangements.

Although they may be dealing with many cases awaiting proper funeral arrangements, it is quite unprofessional of funeral homes to deny survivors to have a wake before the funeral and burial. It robs families of deceased persons of the much-needed condolences and support during such a difficult time. That goes against our human principles and sentimental values. Funeral services allow survivors to eulogize and share stories about the dead loved one, which is critical in ensuring that the deceased has a respectable send-off. In NY Bodies left unclaimed are usually buried by the State on Hart Island.

Hart Island

The Immense Backlog at Crematories

Following the decision by funeral homes to take any additional cases, many families have resorted to cremating the remains of their beloved. The situation has grown so dire, prompting cemetery directors to air their concerns, term it as the highest surge in demand that has never been experienced in many decades.

A significant fraction of the New York population prefers cremating the dead instead of burials. Typically, the four crematories located in the US most densely populated city could comfortably offer cremation services. Still, the coronavirus pandemic has rendered them inadequate to cater to the ever-increasing number of bodies waiting to be cremated. With such an unprecedented backlog of bodies in crematories, it is clear that outdated laws on burials and cremations to be amended. According to these statutes, cremation facilities can only be confined to cemeteries. While there are over 40 cemeteries across the five boroughs in New York, there is only a limited number of crematories.

Among the four facilities, one is located in Brooklyn, one in the Bronx, and the other two in Queens. The surge in the number of bodies has put pressure on resources in crematories. Currently, a location that used to cremate ten bodies each day now has to deal with a more significant daily workload of 15 bodies. Others have to cremate double the number of bodies they would in a single day. That has forced the state government to ease restrictions on air-quality regulations in the bid to allow crematories to extend their hours of operations. Still, many families continue to ring them at odd hours, making these locations busier than they ever been in decades.

Shortening the Wait: Covid-19 Victims Transported Upstate for Cremation

As a result of that, the pressure trickles down to hospitals where “new” dead bodies are presented in morgues in large numbers. Patients who have passed on now have to spend more time in the morgue because the “government restrictions have made it challenging for families to make quick funeral arrangements.” Furthermore, doctors and nurses are delaying signing death certificates because of the increasing backlog and newly reported cases that occur in their hundreds every day. That presents a big problem because bodies cannot be transported to crematory facilities without a complete death certificate.

The situation is so dire that caskets containing bodies of Covid-19 victims have filled funeral homes. The last resort is to transport them upstate to help families to access cremation services as quickly as possible.

Associate professor of mortuary sciences, Mr. David Penepent, who manages the funeral services administration program at the New York State University in Canton, started the “Hands with a Heart” initiative that works to transport the bodies to crematories in upstate New York and other neighboring states where there the number of bodies awaiting cremation is still manageable.

Mr. Penepent was overwhelmed when he was greeted by the astonishing number of cardboard caskets with bodies at one of the funeral homes in Queens. With help from his two students, they wheeled out the bodies, first lining them in the hallway, before gently laying the boxes in one of their two vans destined for a crematory outside New York.

Since the start of April, the Hands with a Heart program has transported decedents from overwhelmed cremation facilities and funeral homes to crematories in far-off places such as Pennsylvania and Vermont. According to Mr. Penepent, “These are not simply bodies. We are handling people with families who love them. Therefore, we do this with care, compassion, dignity, and respect.”

During the Easter weekend, the initiative had successfully moved 70 bodies, followed by 150 the following week, and last week, 300 bodies were transported. The program comes as a relief to grieving families that could have otherwise waited for days and even weeks to access cremation services. It has also eased the pressure off funeral homes and hospital morgues that have been hit the hardest by the pandemic.

Why Such a Backlog in Crematories During the Covid-19 Pandemic?

To curb the spread of the new coronavirus, the federal and state governments have laid down measures to try and control the transmission rate of the disease. Virtually every state went in lockdown with administrative officials urging people to practice social distancing. That meant that businesses were closed, reducing the income for many would-be-working Americans. Further, over 26 million have filed unemployment claims. That said, the economic crisis has forced families to turn to the economic appeal of cremation as the only option. Hopefully many will have full blown memorial services once social distancing is a memory.

Cremation Memorials Are More Important Than Ever!

With the lack of public funerals and the support that they bring to survivors. People are spending their money in more creative ways starting with visual online funerals and memorial pages where people can pay tribute from home. Keepsakes and jewelry that holds ashes inside is a way that people have been using to help bring comfort to the loss while keeping a physical part of their loved one closer, with no need to visit a cemetery.

Click Here For Our Full Selection of Crystals Made From Ashes
Crystal Gems Made From Ashes
Ashes in glass
               From Ashes Comes Art

 

 

 

Americans Avoiding Funerals and Not Leaving Their Mark!

Part I: Americans Not Making Their Mark and Avoiding Funerals

Funeral For Who
                                                    Want To Make Your Mark? Plan Your Funeral!

There are only three realities in life: birth, death, and taxes. The most profound and complex of the three is, of course, death. We have 9 months to prepare and plan a birth. We plan for our tax returns each year but many of us do not plan on dying! Not planning to die is not only foolish but selfish as well. The large unknown, that occurs after life, and the nature of death isn’t easy to think about for anyone. The notion that one day you’re here and the next it all will end, can be frightening to contemplate  for both oneself and others. You can “Go Out With a Bang” or fade away in a fizzle! Too many today don’t choose and lose.

 

After death, those most strongly affected are loved ones – not the person who passed away. Thus, funerals are for the living and in grief, these individuals are often required to make the decisions about the funeral, memorials and transitioning a loved one from alive to remembered. For some, this can be a challenge. It’s hard to accept the permanent end of life for someone who is dearly loved and will be sincerely missed. Planning a funeral means accepting that a loved one is really, truly gone or that you will be gone. As we are forced to face our own mortality or when no instructions or specific plans have been requested from the deceased in life, one may opt for avoiding any kind of traditional send off. As such, funerals are starting to fall out of vogue. It’s not uncommon for the younger generation to skip funerals entirely in favor of other, more simplistic unorganized gatherings that lack the finite nature of a funeral or a transition in life, without the life being acknowledged. Where is the acknowledgment of a life well lived? Where’s the beef?! Where is the support circle? What is the legacy?!

My Funeral

Today’s world is becoming increasingly “me” centered, with individuals focusing on their own wants and needs, rather than those around them. As virtual communication replaces face-to-face interactions, selfishness replaces selflessness and an evolution toward a self-involved attitude becomes normalized, there’s little motivation to consider what others may require.

Regardless of reasoning, choosing not to have a funeral of some kind is a very selfish option and can carry serious ramifications. Yes, a funeral is one of the most important “Gifts” you can give to the people you care about in your life. The more memorable experience you plan about your own valuable life, the more you will be remembered. Your life goals and beliefs of what is good for this world need not be taken to the grave. What you valued and strived for can and should be continued for many generations to come. These are the folks that will cement your legacy! Help Them! A funeral is an important part of the cycle of life and the cycle of grief. A good funeral or memorial is the foundation that people will move on from as they move to the next stepping stone of life. Despite the importance of the ritual, of a memorial ceremony, many Americans are still choosing to forgo tradition.

The Historical Prominence of Funerals

Irish Funeral ProcessionFunerals are not an American concept that is now being overlooked or even a Western concept. In reality, funerals have existed in countless different human societies for thousands of years, indicating the importance of honoring the dead to many ancient and modern people. Conservative estimates place the first human funerals around 300,000 years ago with evidence of burial ceremonies spanning across continents and cultures. Even animals have organized farewells. Elephants will go many miles for days just to visit with the earthly remains of friends and family.

The idea of acknowledging the end of life is not new, as is demonstrated by the rich historical tradition of celebrating the end of life. The alarming evolution of disregarding this important, cultural moment is only hurting, not helping – after all, funerals have a long legacy for a reason.

The Decline of Sentimentality

There’s no way around it: funerals are on the decline. There were around 1,500 fewer funeral homes in 2019 than there were in 2009. Even though more people than ever are dying each year (Boomers), funeral homes are going out of business at an alarming rate. Many people view spending thousands of dollars, on what often feels like a sad goodbye, to be frivolous and fruitless. This often results in it feeling like an expensive and labor-intensive task that is more stressful than beneficial to those doing the planning. Why pay for a funeral that is just like the last three funerals you attended? Where is the value in an impersonal, cookie cutter funeral inserted into a two thousand year old ceremony that has no meaning for today’s society? For this reason, it’s becoming more and more common for those closest to the deceased, like parents and friends, to give up on the idea of having a funeral entirely. With no foreseen value, they feel the money would be better spent on a fine caterer at the local clubhouse and survivors best attempt at some sort of tribute.

In many cases, however, the choice to forgo a funeral falls on the decedent. Too often, the word “just” is uttered in relation to funerals. People “just want to be cremated” or “just have their ashes distributed in a favorite place” and “just have a party”. The idea of permanence is fleeing the American mentality. Before and after death, the idea of leaving a mark is less common than ever before. This may be driven by a number of factors, from the perception of permanence in online activities to the increasingly nihilistic approach to life held by so many in the younger generations. In a disposable society,  just dispose of me! I’ve actually heard people say put my ashes in the trash “what do I care” I’ll be gone! As someone that worked many years as a funeral director, this disgusts me and is the epitome of selfishness.

Cash over Life
Chasing Dollars Can Cost You !

In American culture, the race to the top often means a focus on cash above all else. The classic line “Greed is Good” is bad! As the gap between the lower class and the upper class continues to widen, thanks to a failed two-party system of government, many Americans are underemployed and working multiple jobs just to meet simple life goals. The gig economy is alive and well, with adults choosing to work for companies like Uber and Lyft on nights and weekends just to make a little extra cash. While this sounds like a benefit in the present and immediate future, the ongoing quest for the Almighty Dollar can change long-term views on the world. When making a few hundred dollars requires hours behind the wheel, delivering people or packages, investing in something as seemingly useless as a funeral becomes much less important.

Regardless of the reasons, many Americans aren’t interested in leaving a mark or a legacy on the world. Instead, they are often concerned with the path of least resistance – “just” have me cremated and I’ll be gone – even when this mentality is to the significant detriment of others. Funerals provide a closure that no other form of remembrance can, and a failure to properly do so may be permanently harming the American psyche.

Part II: How Funeral Directors Are Failing

Funerals have long been considered a recession-proof industry. After all, everyone dies sooner or later. However, as of late, this is failing to be the case. As Americans continue to disregard the importance of funerals by adopting an increasingly blasé attitude toward life, death, and what comes after, it’s becoming more popular to ignore funerals and simply move on without much fanfare after the loss of a loved one.

Many industries have found themselves forced to change with the advent of the internet and the ways in which enhancements in technology have altered the human experience. The funeral industry is still stuck in days gone by. Funeral homes are often family-run operations, with traditions passed down from parent to child for generations. As such, there is little motivation to change how things have historically been done. Competing in an experience based society can be a disadvantage to the tradition of “The Body” based service steeped in age old ways.

Funeral Director with head up ass
Typical Funeral Director Response !

Most funeral directors are living in denial and failing to see the changes required in the funeral industry to avoid going extinct. Instead of staying flexible and working with the needs of consumers, funeral directors feel inclined to push  traditional services in a funeral home space with expensive burials of caskets and vaults. Much of how modern funeral homes operate is based on marketing techniques to funeral directors by American casket manufacturers.

This classic funeral concept has worked for generations, but today’s world is a very different place.

Traditional Funeral
nd gravestones. Burial and memorial s

The idea of a traditional funeral can be to some more of a burden than a blessing, and it’s something many Millennials and Gen-Xers who want the bare minimum will not embrace. Yet, even with this knowledge, funeral directors are actively resisting change and failing to meet the needs of an evolving market. Funeral directors want to stay strong against the “just” mentality of the modern American and, by shooting themselves in the foot in this manner, they are actively hurting their own industry as well as the perception of funerals overall. Sure, there are some standout funeral businesses that are more progressive that offer updated options and experienced based funerals but their prices will weed out many that are savvy enough to pull off a meaningful DYI memorial.

The Cost of Funerals

Funeral CostThe cost of the average funeral is not helping the declining funeral industry. Today, funerals are more expensive than ever, with the average funeral running close to $10,000 – and more if a pricey traditional casket is in use. This number can be outside the bounds of affordability for many families, but as the industry dwindles, there’s no wiggle room for many funeral directors attributed to stricter financial requirements.  There’s still pressure to push big, elaborate funerals, even on people who do not appear to want them. This has created a whole new player in the game. The discount cremation or cremation society and business is thriving. Direct cremation is $1000. -$2000! They can provide a “no frills” cremation for less than half the cost of the “classy funeral homes” that are trapped by the overhead of fancy buildings, auto’s and salaries. Instead of changing their business model, the family funeral home owners may opt to sell their valuable real estate and retire to the suburbs.

In spite of all this, funerals don’t have to be expensive. With the rise of cremation and the cost savings of urns and cremation keepsakes versus traditional caskets and burial vaults, it can actually be relatively affordable to hold a caring memorial for those who have been lost. Your local family owned funeral home can assist you with these simpler services for less then you think. However, this is largely unknown, even by those who are in favor of funerals, leading to a disinterest because of the perceived costs. Nothing saves money more than knowing what is wanted and desired before a death has accured.

The Federal Trade Commission maintains extensive rules regarding consumer rights in the funeral industry. Consumers must be permitted to purchase bits and pieces as needed, like embalming or cremation services but not caskets, in order to meet individual needs. Funeral directors are also required to be transparent with pricing, providing prospective customers with a general price list that includes the per-piece costs of all elements of products and services.

However, funeral homes are often focused on just getting the job done with no problems, rather than creating healing experiences.   The lazy approach have some choose to push larger packages on the faux principle of sentimentality. By taking this approach, funeral homes are essentially driving away business: Funeral Directors need to listen to what people need and withold  from promoting a large and expensive package that someone doesn’t want or need! It can be an upsetting experience that results in more harm than good. When the high cost of a funeral is combined with the evolving American mentalities, that appear to be pulling away from important traditions, far too many people are willing to just walk away, and that’s not Okay! By providing alternatives and new traditions, by educating and offering progressive options to todays family, funeral homes can remain an integral part of the community and people will turn to them for help.

Part III: Why Memorials Matter

Good Funerals
Here’ To You!

Funerals are the ultimate way to say goodbye, creating an opportunity for those who care about the decedent to come together, share stories, pay their respects and remember. Relationships are both reinforced and created at funerals. The seeds of life that we sow, provide the life trees that bear the fruits of your labor of love. A foundation of support can be the starting point on the healing highway.

Grave Marker
WHO?

Despite the appeal of skipping the formalities of a funeral, planning to do so can be a very poor decision. By failing to recognize the finality of life and give everyone, even old friends and distant family members, a chance to pay their respects and support each other, too many people will be left twisting in the wind, hurt and confused. There are more people in a decedent’s life than their spouse and children, and those people deserve a way to be involved in the death, too. By choosing not to hold a funeral or memorial, family members, and in some cases the decedents themselves, are effectively usurping the grieving process for many others, leaving a hole in the hearts of friends, acquaintances, and coworkers who were anticipating a way to not only say goodbye but to say hello to others that are woven into the tapestry of life.

Providing Direction….

Funerals serve several important roles in life, including:

  • Acknowledgement of the end: The first of the stages of grief is denial, as it can be hard to admit a loved one is gone for good. A funeral provides a way to overcome this step and accept that the end of life is a reality that can’t be ignored or pushed aside.
  • A chance to say goodbye: Whether a ceremony involves an open casket or the presentation of an urn, a funeral is often the last time in which loved ones get to stand in the presence of the deceased. This opportunity to say goodbye can be extremely valuable in overcoming grief.
  • A community: A funeral is a way for people to come together, creating a community of those experiencing similar emotions. By uniting people in grief, the community provided by a funeral can facilitate the healing process, reminding mourners that they aren’t alone.
  • An ongoing support system: Death is never easy to deal with. The stages of grief can be an overwhelming roller coaster, and without those who understand, it can be very hard to make it to the other side without negative ramifications in other areas of life. A funeral provides the foundation of a support system, showing evidence of those who understand what you are feeling and who you can turn to in times of grief. Often, important plans are made at funerals for survivors to re-connect, to maintain old traditions and to start new traditions as well.
  • A reflection on life and death: It’s easy to ignore the presence of death and the impact it can have on life when not experiencing the emotions first hand. This denial isn’t always healthy, as death is inevitable and will happen to everyone at one point or another. A funeral provides a reason to think about the fleeting nature of time spent on earth and offers a way to help individuals come to terms with the complex emotions that often surround the end of life.

Denying these benefits to those who love you – or denying the benefits to others, for spouses left to plan a funeral for someone who left no post-death instructions – is a selfish choice, which can have lasting effects on mental health and the progression of grief.

Instead of a funeral, the idea of alternative memorials is becoming more common. Spouses, parents, and siblings no longer want to put the effort into funeral planning when grief is so raw and instead host small intimate gatherings to reminisce before moving toward cremation. While this can be a nice gesture, it’s not the same as making sure all of the important people in one’s life have a chance to be involved in a final farewell.

Creating the Perfect Memorial

Come One Come All, Gather Round!

It’s important to understand that a funeral doesn’t have to be a stuffy experience in a drab hall, decked out in solemn colors. Some funeral homes have updated and now resemble catering halls more than funeral homes. Funeral directors can also assist you with the event in other locations of your choice. Progressive funeral directors are highly skilled event planners and have the equipment and connections to get things done, fast! If your local funeral home does not offer progressive options, you may want to consult with your local event planners and reception halls. The tradition of calling hours or wake preceding the funeral and the viewing of “The body” is not as mainstream as once was. When I was studying to be a funeral director (class of 1984) it was instilled that it was hard to even begin any kind of grieving process without viewing the body and coming face to face with the reality of death. I have seen the new generation of public more and more uncomfortable with public viewings but I still feel it can be an important aspect of the grieving process.

Scary Stuff

My general school of thought is: the younger and more unexpected or tragic the death, the more important viewing the deceased is. However, having a viewing does increase the cost of a funeral homes services and this should be expected. Don’t make the mistake of not having viewing just because cremation is the final disposition. It’s perfectly normal to have the cremation performed after the services. In fact, the main difference between a funeral and a memorial is that the body is present at a funeral and not present at a memorial. So, in today’s majority choosing cremation the order of services could be for example; have the viewing then cremate followed by a memorial with the cremation urn present or have the viewing followed by a funeral (Body present) and then cremate. So, don’t let the choice of cremation determine what kind of service you want to have, you can still have any style of service you prefer.

These days Hospice is often involved in the weeks and days prior to death. They can be very helpful and help people to be more comfortable and at ease with the process of dying. Be aware that Hospice will often push final goodbyes while the person is still alive to avoid having to do so again after death. This can be a mistake and not considered a replacement for a funeral or memorial. Hospice also encourages cremation; they operate on a Buddhism based philosophy in which cremation is the way. Don’t let them push you into anything you do not want and be persuaded to avoid funerals

Funerals, or any kind of celebration of life, can be customized to both the deceased’s wants and the family’s needs. Funerals can be held anywhere, like a favorite park, provided proper permits are obtained, a backyard, or the family church. Funerals can also be hosted by anyone; you may have a charismatic family member that’s willing to do their best but it can be frustrating and uncertain working with a non-professional.

Celebrant Foundation
You Can Find a Celebrant Near You.. Click Here!

The best choice for a truly meaningful ceremony is to a hire a Certified Funeral Celebrant. Celebrants are becoming an increasingly common option for those who want a professional ceremony without any of the outdated traditions often associated with the funeral industry. With the ability to create a sentimental ceremony in a way that honors a decedent’s personality and interests, a celebrant can easily lead a funeral that best speaks to the needs of family and friends.

When presented with the idea of a more organic, natural, or creative funeral, many individuals are far more enticed. The idea of being memorialized in an urn at a favorite park versus stiff in a casket in a funeral home is often more welcoming, and can make the idea of putting plans in place in a will less daunting or uncomfortable. In many ways, this sort of celebration can fall into the “just” mindset – just hold a simple event for all of my family and friends to attend and enjoy after I have left this earth – even though the reality is much different. Family and friends still get to mourn as needed while individuals can still leave a mark and promote a legacy as is most important to them.

Ongoing Memorials

No mater what style of funeral or memorial you have, the days and years following can become a cold reality of loss. We naturally want to visit the memories of our relationships with those we lose. Visits to the cemetery may not be possible when ashes are scattered. But if people want to “Go Out With a Bang” you can now purchase a handheld ash scattering cannon called “The Loved One Launcher”! So, it could be a good idea to have a stone memorial placed on your home garden or property. Many people today are comforted by the display of photos and having the cremation urn at home, for example, can be used to display remains in a tasteful and dignified way that can serve as a reminder of a lost loved one’s enduring presence. In the days, months, and years following a funeral ceremony, the urn will continue to stand.

Click Here For Our Full Selection of Crystals Made From Ashes
Crystal Gems Made From Ashes

Memorial jewelry can also be an impactful way to memorialize someone lost. These keepsakes are filled with a small amount of ashes inside so their earthly remains will always be close to your heart. Glass pendants and sculptures are made when a portion of ash is artfully infused into intricate works of art. Cremation ashes can also be used in the production process to create a real diamond or colorful cremation crystals.

Despite the decline in the traditional funeral industry, death is no less of a reality today than it has ever been. By thinking outside the box and embracing the alternatives available, end of life planning for both individuals and their families can take a very different form, resulting in plans for the end that respect personal wishes as well as the needs of loved ones – and allow for the opportunity to preserve a legacy.

Will Millennials Be The “Death Positive” Generation?

Some industry experts are saying that the millennials will be the generation that embraces a new way of death and start death positive traditions. Millennials have learned from their elders that to not plan on the inevitable can be both expensive and creates a haphazard situation that can yield more rushed poor choices. In a 2016 survey by the National Funeral Directors Association, 81 percent of respondents said they called only one funeral home before making their decision. Millennials are avoiding this and are willing to use the internet and apps to help them make informed decisions and guess what? They do understand the value of a well-done event that honors a well lived life. Studies have shown that people are planning their will and final plans at a younger average age. These young hipsters are not going to pick up the yellow pages to call a funeral home so they can be told what they need to do! They use the internet to not only save money but to learn and make informed decisions while staying in the drivers seat.

Hansa Bergwall was 35 when he created the app WeCroak, a digital-age memento mori that reminds its 30,000 monthly users that are going to die five times a day — presumably to help them live in the moment. Like death, the reminders come at random times of the day. When they come, you can open the app to reveal a quote about death from a poet, philosopher, or notable thinker. Then take one moment for contemplation, conscious breathing or meditation. We believe that a regular practice of contemplating mortality helps us accept what we must, let go of things that don’t matter and honor the things that do. Memorials can be arranged digitally on GatheringUs. You can even draft important legal documents online on sites such as FreeWill where you can draft a legal will in twenty minutes with no human interaction. Finally, you can shop online for just about anything to hold ashes, thanks to funeral director turned online merchant Jeff Staab. You can choose from exotic urns to jewelry and gems- Cremation Solutions has got you covered! Even monuments that hold ashes and urns inside. One product that has been really catching hearts is jewelry made from the deceased fingerprint, with “Your Touch” line of fingerprint pendants and rings.

The new generations crave information, even on end of life planning and funeral alternatives. For those who reach out to the internet there are new movements or groups that will help you plan a home funeral and embrace death the “Old Fashion Way”. People used to live far closer to death. Before the turn of the 20th century, women from your family and your community would lay you out in the home usually in bed. They would wash you, dress you in simple clothes. Groom and comb your hair, clip a lock of it to wear in a necklace, like we now do with pendants that hold ashes. Family and friends would gather round, reciting prayers, singing, surrounding you with candles and flowers. And when it was time for burial your family would wrap you in a shroud or sheet, often made of wool, and put you in a wood casket. Finally, a group would carry your coffin to the backyard or the town cemetery and, after a small service, lower you into a hand dug grave. The whole process demanded work, attention, a reckoning. An emerging internet-based organization called Crossings will now help you to organize “Home Funerals” just like Great Grandma! For the first time ever, Americans are choosing cremation more than not. This trend has increased each year. It seems that people don’t understand that cremation is just a final disposition and does not mean you still can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes. Well, you just might find you get what you need! And have “One Hell of a Funeral” and make your mark!

Cremation Products
Everything For Ashes!

How Word Clouds Are Helping The Dying

Dying in bedThe Intensive Care Unit is a place where most people spend their last moments. The families of the dying have a hard time since they get to watch their loved ones in their last moments. There have been different kinds of research conducted to find ways that the dying and their families can be made comfortable during this difficult time. There is a need to find ways that health-care providers can connect with their patients since it is believed that there is no connection between them. One discovery that has proved to be effective in providing comfort to the dying and their families and make physicians and nurses more involved in the lives of their patients is the use of word clouds.

Word clouds are being used to give those who are in need of intensive care happy memories during their last days. The word clouds are being used by Canadian doctors to make the intensive care unit more humanizing and comfort the families of those who are dying. Word clouds make health professionals forge relationships with the patients.image

Word clouds are graphic representations of patient descriptions that are generated through wordle.net and have been used in the ICU of St. Joseph’s Health-care. The word clouds have proved to be economical ways of relieving patients and their families during the difficult and stressful time. Staff members of the health-care facility have incorporated the use of word clouds in their regular lives.

Comforting The DyingThe use of word clouds in health-care has had a great impact on the provision of care to patients. The word clouds are also used by health-care professionals to care for the patients. They are considered to be a form of art and are used to tell stories about the patients to family members and health-care professionals. Word clouds are helping the dying by allowing their stories to be told instead of only focusing on their last days. The patient using word clouds is seen as a whole person, and their life story can be narrated in a creative way.

With word clouds, families can bond with the dying without focusing on the bad times or how they are spending their last days. It provides relief since they can talk about the good times and share happy memories. However, it is not only for family members but health-care professionals as well. The professionals get to interact with the patients, and they get reminded of why they got into the profession. The word clouds give the health-care providers a chance to appreciate human life and the good moments they shared with their patients. It gives them a sense of healing knowing they did something good for the patient and made their lives more enjoyable.

The ICU is considered a very stressful place to work in and the use of word clouds makes the stress more bearable. It leans towards the practice of narrative medicine. Narrative medicine is a care model that allows patient stories to be recognized and show the different parties the essence of having a common humanity.

Physicians who have used word clouds describe it as being beautiful since it brings everyone together. It makes it easier for physicians to forge meaningful connections with the dying and the families. These connections are important in the provision of care as it makes it easier for them to understand the patient’s needs and cater to them in a better way.

In forming these bonds, the health-care providers get to learn more about the patient. They learn what makes the patient reluctant to give up and why they are eager when they hear footsteps approaching. They get to know how they remain determined during the entire time and the things they consider valuable to them. Narrative medicine makes it easier to identify with the dying person as a fellow human being and not only as a patient.

Memorial Word CloudWord clouds remain even after the person has died. Family members report that the use of word clouds has made them feel closer to their loved one even after they died. Looking at the images makes it easier for them to reflect on the life of their loved one instead of focusing on how they spent their last days. The use of word clouds has shown the world that physicians care deeply about the welfare of their patients and they are genuinely concerned about what happens to them. Initially, physicians and nurses could only be seen briefly when they were giving bad news to the family. With word clouds, they can have a more active role in the life of the dying patient. Dying patients, the families, and the medical professional can be on the same side since they all share a common humanity. Word clouds have brought together a community that was initially divided.

The use of word clouds is not only useful in the provision of health-care but eulogy writing and the making of funeral arrangements.

Word clouds can be used to make the dying more comfortable. They give narratives of the patient making it easier for people to focus on happy memories. After the patient passes on, the family is left to make funeral arrangements and write the eulogy.

The use of word clouds to write narratives of the dying person can be used in writing the eulogy. A eulogy tells the life story of those who pass on and the achievements that they made during their lifetime. Word clouds can be used to give an interesting description of their life story and let people focus on happy memories instead of being sad. They will engage the loved ones of the deceased who will be eager to know more about the life and achievements made when they were alive.

The word clouds also provide an emotional attachment to the deceased since it helps them focus on the main things. Family members who looked at word clouds feel close to their loved one, and it makes it easier for them to reflect on the good memories they had. It makes it easier for them to move on instead of dwelling on how their loved one spent their last days. Health-care professionals will see the word clouds and remember the time spent with the patients.

Word clouds used in eulogy writing will convey a strong message on the life of the patient and how they were determined to keep living and leave a legacy for those they were leaving behind. Those who look at the eulogy find it easier to heal from the loss of their loved one. Family members who were in the study report that they felt a strong connection with the patient and found it easier to focus on happy memories instead of the sad ones.

Physicians and nurses will feel like they had an active role in the lives of their patients since they will have had a chance to understand them better. They will engage with the family of their patient and will appreciate the delicate nature of humanity. The professionals will be more motivated in carrying out their duties since they will have a closer connection with the patients and their families.

The use of word clouds in eulogy writing will enable family members to give details of the patient’s life in a language and manner that is easy for them and others to understand. People will look at the eulogy and see the entire life of the deceased without focusing on the negative. People will understand and have a closer connection to the family. Family members will feel closer to each other since they will share a common person. It will be easier to use word clouds to make it easier for family members and those who were considered close to the deceased to find strength in each other and look back at the good times they spent with their loved one. Word clouds highlight different parts of the life of their loved ones, and they will see how they made the days of the person more enjoyable and fulfilling.

Funeral CelebrantIn the funeral ceremony, the word clouds can be used to highlight important details concerning the life of the person. Those who attend the funeral will have a chance to live together with their loved one as they will feel like they are still together. The family will feel like they have a connection with their loved one even though s/he has already passed on. Word clouds will make it easier for them to remember the deceased and their legacy. It is a way for them to display the documented words of their loved ones as a way to reaffirm their life.

Word clouds are important as they give the dying person dignity even after they are already dead. The families can reconnect with their loved one through looking back to their words. Word clouds being used in health-care will go a long way in improving the care provided to the patients. They will feel better knowing that they can be seen as people and not just as patients. It also makes it easier for family members to accept the reality that their loved ones will eventually die and focus on happy memories they had together.

When Death Becomes Art

Coping with death can be one of the hardest things you’ll ever face. Accepting that you’ll never see, talk to, or touch a person you love is a long and enduring process for family members and friends. Grieving can be a very hard road, and one that many people walk for weeks, months, and even years.

A big part of grieving for many people involves paying tribute, whether through a community event or with a memorial such as a park bench or garden. More and more people are getting creative with memorial works of art and personal memorials that are kept at home and can easily be visited in times of sadness and joy.

When a standard gesture may not be enough families are now turning to the artistic skills of glass artist that specialize in memorial art glass that actually incorporates some of the cremated ashes. With a beautifully-crafted work of art from Cremation Solutions, you can keep your loved one’s ashes alive forever in your memory, your heart, and your home.

Creating the Perfect Memorial

Ashes in glass
From Ashes Comes Art

When you lose some one special, finding an appropriate way to pay homage to their life can take a little creativity. Blown glass cremation statues are handcrafted and unique to you, providing a one of a kind keepsake that you can cherish forever.

Whether you wish to capture a creative spirit gone too soon or would like to develop a physical representation of a loved one, our inventory can help you find a touching tribute to those who matter most. We know that no two souls are exactly the same, which is why we offer dozens of options to help you embody the love and life of the beautiful person you want to remember.

Made from both recycled and non-recycled glass, our touching selection provides the choices necessary to truly celebrate those who have passed on.

The Beauty of Blown Glass

Glass blowing is an incredibly challenging discipline, requiring patience, skill, and attention to detail to execute properly. Each Cremation Solutions piece is handmade specifically to your order, ensuring a custom creation carrying a little piece of someone you love and cherish.

In order to create blown glass pieces, our artisans start with a crucible of hot liquid glass. This glass is then gathered on the end of a hollow steel blow pipe, and then rolled on a hard metal table to create a smooth, rounded shape. In order to keep the glass hot and malleable, the craftsman will continue to place the blow pipe into a roaring furnace.

To shape and expand the glass, the artist will physically blow into the end of the pipe. If necessary, powders, glass sticks, and other elements can be incorporated into the design to add color, texture, and shape. Glass can also be pulled and sculpted with the use of tongs and other tools.

Throughout this process, the cremation ashes you provide to us will be added to the glass piece, incorporating the spirit of your loved one into your handmade creation. Blown glass requires a temperature of over 2000 degrees, higher than that of initial cremation. This extreme heat burns off all carbon deposits, leaving brilliant white ashes that are spread throughout the glass.

Ashes in Turtle glass
Turtles are some of the oldest creatures on earth. The Hawaiian Green Sea Turtle, known as “Honu,” symbolizes good luck, endurance and long life. Turtles can show up as a person’sguardian spirit, known as “Aumakua.” ornaments, paperweights, decorative flowers, sculptures, and other keepsakes, providing the perfect fit for whatever you envision.

Once a piece is finished, it will be transported to a 960 degree oven. Over the course of the next 14 to 24 hours, the oven temperature will drop, allowing the blown glass to cool naturally without the risk of cracking or warping.

Placing Your Order

When you’re ready to memorialize the loss of someone you love, Cremation Solutions is here. Our catalog features over one hundred unique designs.

Once you select a piece and place your order, we will send you a kit to safely mail the ashes you would like to contribute. The ashes will be sent directly to the artist that will be creating your blown glass memorial. All packages are stringently tracked and organized, ensuring the integrity of the remains that you provide. After the ashes are received, work can begin. Your custom handcrafted sculpture will be mailed to you within three to four weeks.

Cremation Glass
The Incredible “Skyward” Sculpture

All of the sculptures, including our stunning Skyward piece shown above are hand-crafted in the USA by one of our master artists.

Why We’re Different

When you would like to keep the strength and spirit of a loved one alive forever, we can provide a beautiful memento fitting for your emotional journey.

If you’re mourning the death of a friend or family member, Cremation Solutions is here to provide you with a caring, compassionate experience.

Dichroic Glass with Ashes
Glass Artist Also Create Jewelry That You Can Wear.
CLICK HERE – Every piece we create is fully customized to your wants and wishes, offering a treasured opportunity to celebrate the beauty within the circle of life.

If you’re seeking the perfect opportunity to memorialize a loss, a glass blown cremation sculpture is a beautiful, unique, and completely customizable way to bring your love to life. Whether you are seeking a creative and abstract piece of artwork or something traditional and whimsical or a cremation urn, we will help you find the ideal way to pay your respects forevermore.

For more information on Skyward, our award-winning showpiece, or any of our other cremation glass keepsakes, we encourage you to contact us at 877-365-9474. One of our experts will guide you through your options, helping you to make a decision that’s truly right for you and your loved one.

The Beauty of Cremation

Walking The Line

There are so many reasons that more and more people are now choosing cremation. Here are some of the main reasons that half of all deaths now elect cremation as the final disposition.

  • More Economical
  • A Greener Earth Friendly Option
  • Less Time Sensitive (Freedom of Time)
  • Easier, No Cemetery Required
  • Endless Memorialization Options
  • Don’t Want To Take Up Space (Land)
  • Like The Idea Of Scattering Ashes
  • Religious Freedom
    Cremation Growth Rate

Funeral CostCOST: When you get down to the basic cost of a funeral, cremation can be significantly cheaper. The average traditional funeral these days can cost $8,000.00 to $15,000.00 or more. And a basic cremation is $1,000.00 to $2,000.00. Why such a broad range in price? Simple, it depends on who you call! And of course the choices that you make. Over the years, I have noticed something about how the general public describes the cost of a funeral that I would like to clear up right now. I noticed that when people quote the cost of a traditional funeral they tend to group all of the related costs together! For example “Mom’s Funeral Cost $18,00.00”… but the actual funeral costs might have been $8,000.00 and included the cost of a cemetery plot, digging the grave, flying in certain relatives, putting aunt Millie up at the Hilton and a $6,000.00 reception at a catering hall. But when quoting the cost of cremation people tend to just quote the basic cost “Instead of having a funeral Dad was cremated and it only cost $995.00”. They don’t mention the $10,000.00 memorial catering cost at the country club, the band and the travel costs! So this is one reason the difference in Cremation versus a Traditional Funeral seems like a huge difference in cost. In actuality Cremation is just a disposition like burial is a disposition and all the related costs depends on the CHOICES THAT WE MAKE. “The cremation cost $995.00”. The burial including the purchase of the plot and digging the grave might only cost $2,000.00 but people never just quote this cost, they lump it all together with the choices that they make. These are the conversations that really annoy funeral directors and instantly put them on the defense of the funeral costs.

What really annoys this particular funeral director is the general consensus that cremation means there isn’t a funeral. “There’s no funeral…he’s being cremated”! The truth is just the opposite. With cremation you can have any kind of funeral you want, even a traditional funeral! The only real difference is that instead of the body going to the cemetery, it goes to the crematory. Remember that cremation like burial is just the final disposition. The word “Funeral” simply means that the body is present at the funeral service. If you have a service without the body present because it was already buried or cremated then we use the term “Memorial Service” or other phrases like a Celebration of Life or a Going Home Ceremony. But if the body is not there it’s not a funeral.

Green AshesGREEN: The general public perceives cremation as a greener alternative to burial. A traditional burial takes up land permanently. And the chemicals that are used for embalming are cancerous and could leak into the water table. Here in the US an outer concrete burial vault is used and requires the manufacture of 1.6 tons of concrete and steel, leaving a large carbon footprint through the process of manufacturing. The caskets are often made of steel and many are shipped here from China (not green). Wooden caskets that are made from unsustainable sources like mahogany destroy the rain forest. BUT cremation isn’t exactly green either! Cremation involves burning fossil fuels (not green) and can release mercury from dental fillings into the air. What’s really green is called “Green Burial” and is only permitted in a natural burial site. More and more of these types of cemeteries are becoming available. Green burial is a burial in a naturally biodegradable casket or shroud with no embalming and no burial vault in a shallow grave. Green burial is the most natural and greenest disposition of all.

TIME: Because we usually want to get people buried in the ground before they rapidly begin to decompose, a burial requires a time frame of urgency that demands some fast leg work and usually having the funeral with in a week! And if you are Jewish then you’re supposed to have the burial by sundown of the day after death! With cremation you have nothing but time. Of course if you’re going to have public visitation with the body present you are back on a time line. But once the cremation is complete the ashes have no “shelf life” and you can plan a memorial celebration of life at your convenience. (WARNING) There is still such thing as waiting too long. Sometimes to meet the schedules of so many, the services are put off for months. For example, when someone dies in the Fall and the family elects to wait until the Spring and make the services part of the family reunion at the club. TOOOO Long! Remember that funerals are to support the living in their grief and loss. A proper memorial services lays the foundation for the healing to begin, just like a wedding provides a platform of support to the joining of a couple for life. With too much time in-between, the months leading up to the service can create more unnecessary grief for the survivors due to a lack of support.

Easier: Planning a funeral with the disposition of cremation can definitely be easier. You have the freedom of time on your side and don’t have to feel rushed about getting the person in the ground! You don’t have to select a casket, a vault, a cemetery plot, and other related items. You have the time to involve family members in the planning process and hopefully can create a memorable experience that will showcase a life well lived. Hire a certified celebrant and put some thought and time into this once in a lifetime event. You have one chance to do it right, so take your time and plan a Celebration of Life that people can connect with and relate to. This is why I promote Celebrant funerals and not some old 2,000 year old ceremony that an uninformed clergy member throws together! (Insert Name Here). Use the time to write down stories to share, collect pictures for display or better yet turn the pictures into a memorial video. Play the perfect music and serve the food that the deceased would be proud of! There are so many services available through your local funeral home that can add to the memorial ceremony experience, so use the time to learn about them. And do some research via the Internet on how to create a special and memorable memorial event.

Memorial Options: There are so many options available when you choose cremation. Like a Traditional Burial you can still have visitation with the body present for the final goodbyes and support for the family. You can also have an event in just about any public location that you desire. Consider a place that can handle the anticipated number of people who will attend. Choose a place where people are comfortable enough to join in and share a ceremony that will shine a spotlight on the life lived and the many ways that this person has affected the lives and the fabric of life. Use pictures, objects, belongings and stories to help those attending connect. The spirit of the deceased will often convey what would be appropriate for their personal celebration.

Cremation CasketThe money saved by choosing cremation can be used to purchase goods and services that will further personalize the experience of joining together to commemorate a life well lived. First, select a casket. This can be as simple as a cardboard box, a simple wooden box or an ornate cremation casket. They call these things alternative containers and by law you need one for cremation to take place.

If you are having a traditional viewing before the cremation then you should get a casket with a fabric interior that is suitable for public viewing. Most funeral homes rent caskets for this purpose and then a cardboard box is used for the actual cremation.

For the ceremony you can use things like memorial folders or prayer cards and custom programs that follow the services and can then be saved as a memory keepsake. Large photos, custom blankets and a video tribute can add to the memorial service. And a tree seedling or seeds that can be taken home and be planted in memory and will continue the circle of life.

Art Made With Ashes
Glass Art Made With Ashes

Cremation UrnIf an urn is used to hold the ashes, many put it on display at the service on a table or alter that is set with candles and flowers. When selecting an urn you should first know the final disposition of the ashes. Will they be kept at home on display, buried in the cemetery, placed in a niche, or scattered to the winds. Cremation urns are specially designed to suit all of these different destinations. Even floating biodegradable urns for scattering in lakes and oceans. One new style of urn converts into a birdhouse following the scattering of the ashes! With the new “Loved One Launcher” ashes can also be blasted 70 feet into the sky along with confetti and streamers. Talk about going out with a bang! When it comes to ashes there is no right or wrong way… just personal choices and family traditions. Often family members will use small keepsake urns to divide the ashes up between family and friends. These keepsake urns allow those who choose to scatter to retain a small amount of the ashes forever.

Ashes Jewelry
Jewelry To Hold Ashes

Cremation JeAshes inside Jewelrywelry serves a similar purpose and can be worn as a lasting tribute and close connection to the loved one. There is cremation jewelry that has an inner chamber to hold the ashes inside and also cremation jewelry that is custom made with the ashes.

Assorted Cremation Monuments

 

 

Even monuments are made that will hold the ashes inside as an alternative to burial. Some are styled like traditional monuments and many look like natural rocks and boulders that can blend right into the family garden. The advantage of cremation style monuments is that they can be moved as well as serve as a memorial focal point.

Scattering: The decision to scatter ashes is no longer unique. With more than half of all Americans and Canadians now choosing cremation.

Clem's Ash Scattering 2005.09.19 016Scattering is NOW the #1 disposition of cremated remains in the United States and Canada and continues to grow. Funeral professionals are the only ones that aren’t catching on. Most funeral professionals consider scattering a dirty and unprofitable choice of final disposition. They will help you get buried or interred. They will help you create funeral and memorial events. But when the choice is to scatter the ashes, they will help you as far as the door! Some of the more progressive funeral homes now offer special urns for families that choose to scatter the ashes, but that’s about as far as it goes.

Cremation can be an exciting and beautiful way to celebrate the deceased and bring together their friends and family for a positive and memorable experience. It provides an opportunity for the departed to bring together those that they leave behind and touched most during their life well lived. Cremation: it can be more economical; it can be greener; it allows for more time and planning; and it has infinite options only limited by the creativity of the living!

All About Military Funeral Honors

Military Funeral MemorialServing the United States of America is among the noblest and most honorable career paths available in this country. To put one’s life on the line to defend our nation’s freedom is worthy of the highest praise, both in service and after death. On Memorial Day, we take this opportunity to celebrate these brave heroes who have fought for our freedom and for those that have lost their lives.

In honor of this selfless commitment made by our service members, a proper burial is the most fitting and respectful tribute to those that are no longer with us. Available to those who have died in the line of duty as well as to eligible veterans who passed away after completing their service, military funerals are a right that all service members receive.

Laws and Practices of Military Burials

Under United States law, all of our eligible veterans are entitled to a military service free of charge. Consisting of an honor guard of no less than two service members, this is to thank the veteran for their service while laying them to rest in the most respectful way possible.

All veterans are entitled to a military burial, which includes an honor guard who will fold and present the veteran’s family with our flag and the playing of Taps. Certain additional honors, like a color guard, a gun salute, and casket bearers may also be available, depending on the deceased’s level of service at the time of death. All arrangements must be requested through a funeral home at least 48 hours in advance to ensure that the proper arrangements are made in time for the ceremony. This ceremonial process is among the most significant aspects of a burial for our service members, and a highly desired and deserved experience for the families dealing with their recent loss.

Military Burial Eligibility

Memorial FlagMilitary burial eligibility depends on several key factors related to the service member’s participation in the armed forces. All servicemen and women who served on active duty or in the Selected Reserve are eligible to receive military burial benefits. In order to be considered an eligible veteran who served on active duty, a service member must have successfully completed a tour of duty, and departed under conditions other than dishonorable. The same is true of Selected Reserve members; those who finished their minimum required period of service and departed under conditions other than dishonorable may receive a military burial. A DD Form 214  is required to establish eligibility. If this form is not available, any other documentation representative of honorable discharge is an acceptable substitution. Click Here For DD Form 214 is available online through the National Archives. Click Here for Flag Application. Click Here For Cemetery Marker Application.

Burial Service Variations

Monument in CemeteryWhile all military service completed honorably is worthy of the highest possible praise, there are different forms of burial services depending on the duration and the type of service.

 

 

Veteran honors are available to anyone who served in the military but did not retire, which includes soldiers across the different branches, and those who were drafted to serve in past times of war. These services include the presentation of our flag by an honor guard and the playing of Taps.

Retiree honors are available for those who served for twenty years or more and retired from service, as well as those who were forced to retire due to health or disability reasons. These services are more involved than veteran honors and include a seven to ten person honor guard team including a chaplain, firing parties, pall bearers, the folding and presentation of our flag, and the playing of Taps.

Full honors are provided for those who passed away during active duty, Medal of Honor recipients, and General Officers. This is the most intricate of all burial honors, and includes a full honor guard of 21 service members, including a chaplain, firing squad, and pall bearers, as well as the folding and presentation of our flag and the playing of Taps.

While there are notable differences in each burial honor, all options are touching tributes, a final farewell for the members and former members of the armed forces as a thank you for the demands and sacrifices required of their military service.

The Military Burial Proceedings

Military burial proceedings are extremely sentimental, providing a thoughtful goodbye for all of our departed service members.

Burial proceedings take place at the cemetery, after the conclusion of a funeral mass or wake, and begin with the arrival of the casket or urn as transported by the funeral home. If a chaplain is present, he will lead the way to the proper plot, where the pall bearers will place the casket or urn on the ground appropriately.

Once at the gravesite, the officer in charge ensures that the flag is level over the casket or urn, and the family takes their seats, or may stand in a semi-circle. When the flag is positioned properly, the chaplain or other officiant will begin the ceremony.

When the service is complete, family members will rise if not already standing, and the officer in charge will give the command to initiate the rifle volley. Taps will play, and the rifle volley will follow. Then the folding of our flag will begin. Once the flag folding is complete, the flag will be passed to the officer in charge, who will present it to the next of kin, generally a spouse, parent, or child. The chaplain will remain to offer his condolences, and the ceremony will conclude.

The Folding of our Flag


The folding of our flag is among the most important parts of a military burial honor. As defenders of this country, the flag of the United States of America holds great symbolism for our armed forces members and their families, so the proper treatment is paramount. The flag should not touch the ground or be otherwise treated with disrespect under any circumstances, by both military members and civilians.

The folding process begins with four service members holding our flag horizontally and level at waist height, and two members holding the top and bottom edges. First, the bottom edge of the stripe section is folded lengthwise over the field of stars, corner to corner, with all borders and corners matching up neatly. This action is repeated again, creating a narrow rectangular shape with the field of stars visible at the top. Throughout this process, the flag should remain parallel to the ground.

While the other members hold the flag taut, the member at the foot of the flag will begin to make triangular folds, starting at the left corner. The newly created corner is then folded in a triangular shape to the right, and then to the left once more, and so on, until nearly the entire flag is folded. Folds should be made slowly and deliberately, to ensure clean lines and neat edges, and edges and corners should be pinched throughout the folding process to create the tightest possible fold.

When the end of the flag is reached, the member holding the top corner of the field of stars should create a small 45 degree fold, and tuck the remaining fabric into the pocket created by the triangular folds. Only the blue field and white stars should be visible; all of the red stripes should be hidden within the folds. Once the flag is neatly prepared, it will be presented to the next of kin.

When the funeral service is complete, the family may do with the flag as they wish, including flying it, or preserving it in a memorial case. Memorial cases can be made at home, or purchased through a specialty vendor. There is nothing wrong with using and flying the military funeral flag, provided the family is comfortable with doing so, and it does not have to remain folded after the completion of the ceremony.

Whether you plan to celebrate Memorial Day with your loved ones or will be participating in a special tribute to those that you have lost, take a moment to truly reflect on what this day means in the hearts of all Americans. Honoring death is never easy, but for those who served, your respect and devotion to them on this special day is greatly appreciated. The heroes of our armed forces are why we have our freedom, so raise a glass, and be sure to say thank you to the men and women in your life who have made the ultimate commitment and sacrificed their life for our great country.

THANK YOU...
THANK YOU…

What Funeral Directors Should Worry About Part II

Funeral Director Last month, I asked thousands of Funeral Professionals what they worried about the most. I received a very low response rate, which is typical for funeral professionals as they usually don’t participate in the destiny of their own industry. I did get a general idea of what they worry about. They seem to worry about the day to day challenges of planning a funeral and disposition. To can see their responses (Click Here).  What did surprise me is that no one worries about the actual funeral ceremony itself. They worried about the scheduling and logistics, such as the officiant and the organist showing up. As far as the funeral being a personable and healing experience to those attending…no one seems to worry about this at all! It seems strange to me that people called funeral directors rarely get involved in the funeral ceremony itself. Long ago funeral directors gave that responsibility to the clergy. The general public, driven by an aging boomer generation, no longer see the value of the traditional clergy <insert name here>, and their two thousand year old funeral rituals. Go figure?

No Value FuneralsThe devaluation of the funeral experience is what funeral professionals should be worried about the most. As a funeral director, our greatest contribution should be creating a healing environment where people can come together for a memorable experience. The experience should promote those in attendance to support one another in their grief. The life of the deceased is the star and the overall theme is how that person’s life affected their world and the world of others. Since we have dropped the ball on this aspect of funerals, we have created a snowball effect of new things to worry about such as: Cremation Societies popping up in each and every town; Funeral and event planners working directly with hotels and catering halls because they can do it better themselves; and the price shoppers oh my!

 

 "The New Enemy"

“The New Enemy”

Funeral Directors have created a new enemy by not paying attention to the needs of the families they serve, and their desire to have a positive funeral experience. The new enemy of the funeral is the word “JUST”! As in just cremate me and scatter my ashes in the garden. Just bury me in a plain pine box and have a party in my memory down at the club house. Hospice did such a great job and we already said our goodbyes so we won’t need a funeral service. We joined a cremation society so no funeral home is going to get my money! Does this sound familiar? The good news is that the general public is more spiritual then ever and really do want to have a memorable event. They just don’t want a funeral like the last three that they attended. So I’m not sitting here flapping my lips about the self inflicted gloom and doom of the funeral industry. Instead I will provide a solution. The solution is to take the control of the funeral away from the Clergy! Don’t worry about offending the clergy since they aren’t helping your business. You can still use clergy as required, but we need to take control of the funeral ceremony and become funeral planners instead of merely being the director of logistics. How funerals are experienced and how they make people feel is everything. Your future depends on it so become a part of it! For me the number one solution to the public’s disenchantment of funerals is the use of Certified Funeral Celebrants. They are trained in creating meaningful and personal celebrations of life that will leave those in attendance (your future clients) saying WOW! That’s the kind of funeral I want! There is no better form of advertising than doing “Good Funerals”.

Jeff Staab
Funeral Director/Author Jeff Staab
 As a funeral director with over twenty years of experience, I can tell you that we already have enough to worry about. As I mentioned in the proceeding blog post (What Funeral Directors Worry About), we tend burn out pretty fast as far as professions go. One solution is for funeral home operators to hire high quality non-licensed personnel to manage the everyday details that the Funeral Directors are typically tasked with. That way the Funeral Directors can focus on the big picture of running the funerals and growing the overall reputation of the funeral home, by turning out high quality funerals that people will remember. Unlike Clergy, Funeral Celebrants are trained to work with funeral homes and support the funeral homes that they work with. Funeral homes that are already regularly using and advertising the use of Celebrants have seen their rate of pre-arranged funerals increase by as much as 20%. This is an unexpected bonus and a healthy direction, instead of seeing the shrinking business that so many funeral homes are now experiencing.

 

Creative Funerals

So what I am saying is hire forward thinking-creative minded Funeral Directors that focus on the funeral experience for the client and their family and friends. Disenchanted, unmotivated, and lazy order taking funeral directors with no creativity Need Not Apply! Having strong communication skills and being “A Good Listener” will help to establish a more sharing and involved consumer that will really get the creative juices flowing.

Getting Creative!
Getting Creative!

The funeral home that partners with Celebrants will be growing their brand and will be positively shared by the word of mouth within the community. By the way, word of mouth is now social media and if you aren’t online being involved in the online conversations, then attending all of those Chamber & Rotary meetings is a complete waste of your time and money. If you don’t have the time or the staff at your funeral home to maintain an online social media presence, then you can hire professionals to maintain and grow your funeral homes social network. I would recommend entrusting the team over at Disrupt Media to manage your funeral homes online social reputation and presence.

So how can we do better funerals? That is what Funeral Directors should be worried about! With that in mind, I would love to hear more ideas on how can we create a more memorable and personable funeral experience. Open the flood gates that are holding back your ideas and share!

What Funeral Directors Worry About

In the funeral business, everything is in the details. Unlike a wedding which people often plan for months and sometimes for years, a funeral arrives suddenly and will require some hurried and frantic planning and scheduling. Pre-planning funerals helps but since we can’t always predict or schedule death, many of the details for a funeral or memorial service are quickly arranged by the surviving family members under the guidance of a funeral director. Getting all of the details right rest on the shoulders, mind, experience, and reputation of the funeral director. This is why funeral directors WORRY A LOT!

Funeral Guy
I Hope My Dick Doesn’t Fall Off

For many funeral directors the worry becomes far too much for them to handle. Many funeral directors won’t last more than five years before burning out and seek another profession. It’s not only the worry but also the personal dedication and commitment to a business that is 24 -7-365. It is disruptive to your family and social life. Funeral directors have to arrange and schedule everything in a matter of hours for a major life event! For me personally the 20 years was a bit too long. By then I was drinking like a fish. The chest pains stopped the day after I quit!

I recently asked a group of funeral directors what they worry about the most and here are their responses:

-“Flowers, grave digger, vault company, printers, obituaries, cosmetics, weather, music, ministers, permits, paperwork, families, friends, and just about everything.”

 

-“I would definitely think one of the biggest things we worry about is getting everything perfect and every little detail. Also making sure that the family’s last image of their loved one is one that won’t haunt them.”

 

-“I always worry about what I can do the nights that I’m on call. It seems that we limited ourselves sometimes socially. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had to miss holidays and parties and nights where my friends go out because I’m on call. Granted, that is a selfish thing to worry about. But I don’t think the general public knows about that side of being a funeral director.”

 

-“I worry about my kids dying. I worry about me dying. I worry about when my kids die and the funeral home doesn’t take care of them with dignity. I guess that’s not really relevant for your public info, just sharing.”

-“Will I find a job after my apprenticeship?”

-“What’s to be left in a casket?”

-Aspirator line rupture!

-“Getting paid, scheduling overlap! Will the officiant show up, disease, purge, leakage, restorative art, family feuds, musicians, newspaper deadlines for obits, paperwork delays, permits, pall bearers, and paying my bills.”

-“Cancer causing embalming fumes, needle pricks, tissue gas, and my bad back!”

-“I mostly worry about the family and their complete satisfaction of my service. The reputation of our funeral home and how my life depends on it. Shrinking profits due to the growing trend of direct cremation.”

-“Picking up the wrong body, cremating the wrong body, making a wrong turn leading a funeral procession, catching a disease, the strength of the bottom of these new cheap Chinese caskets as we carry the 300lb dude up the church steps. Hope the handles don’t tear off.”

-“I worry about the fat guy in the bathtub on the second floor and the narrow staircase. The neighbors noticed the mail was building up and then they noticed an unusual smell!”

I hope that when the general public reads this that they will appreciate the dedication and respect that funeral directors across the world provide to the deceased and their family members. It’s not an easy life and demands a personal commitment that many professionals could not begin to comprehend. They help people through one of life’s biggest challenges. Their customers are distraught and demanding. Even people that are normally relaxed and easy going can become sensitized as they grieve. In a business where everything is in the details, absolute perfection can be an extreme challenge. Thank God the funeral directors are experts in getting all of the details just right!

Living Funerals…The Party of a Lifetime

You'll Never Know
You’ll Never Know What They Said About You

When most people think of funerals, they think of family and friends standing around a casket, dressed in black, with tissues in their hands, feeling bad about what they might have said or failed to say to the person who died while he or she was living. Certainly, the majority of end-of-life events include some sort of memorial service. However, there is a growing trend towards celebrating a person’s life with a living funeral.

What is a living funeral?

A living funeral, also called a life celebration, is a chance to rejoice in a person’s life while they are still around to share your stories and enjoy the gathering of friends and family. Such an event can be as simple as an afternoon tea for those closest to you or as elaborate as a big, society wedding reception. Unlike traditional funerals time will be on your side and you will be able to take the time to carefully plan an appropriate final act. Living funerals also allow the guest of honor to be involved in the planning as well as experience the love and support of those their lives.

One of the most poignant and talked about holiday commercials this season comes from Germany and shows an aging grandfather putting out the word of his own (premature) demise after being told by various family members that they don’t have time to travel to see him for a holiday dinner. When the family DOES gather for his supposed funeral, he surprises them by being alive and hosting that dinner they were all too busy to attend. When asked why he pulled such a stunt, he replied that it was the only way for him to get everyone together. The last frame shows them all eating and enjoying one another’s company. Such is the logic of a living funeral.

Watch the commercial here.

Others will remember the book “Tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom (and the Oprah Winfrey-produced movie by the same name.) In this real-life story, Morrie Schwartz, who was in his 80s and dying from Lou Gehrig’s disease, attends a friend’s funeral and is saddened to realize that his friend will never get to hear all of the nice thing people are saying about him or hear their stories. When Morrie returns home, he starts planning his own living funeral, complete with a gospel choir.

My friend Ray

My first experience with a living funeral was in June 2012 when my good friend Ray invited me to his “Birthday Party.” Ray was battling cancer, and I’m pretty sure he knew it was going to be his last birthday party. Ray had never heard of a living funeral. However, he knew that he wanted to have a party with all his friends and this was his way of doing it. He rented a pavilion in our hometown park in Oyster Bay, New York. He hired a great band band. (Ray loved live music). He called the caterers and he had the grills going with some of his favorite foods. It was great, far better then any funeral could have been! Yet, in a very real way, it WAS Ray’s funeral, his goodbye present to us.

There was no formal ceremony at Ray’s “birthday party” except for a couple announcements and, of course, the happy birthday song that made it hard for me to hold back my tears. (I wasn’t alone.) Ray brought out years of scrap books and shared some stories with us.

Ray in His Element
Ray in His Element

I had to laugh when I noticed Ray surrounded by girl friends including his wife Deb all huddled together, looking at pictures. Ray looked up at me and gave me that “yep I’m the man look.” (Ray was a stud). Shortly after the party health permitting Ray took some trips and experienced as much life and friendships as he could. I gave him a good book on funeral planning that day and offered my experience. Looking back, I think he already had made his funeral plans and he never mentioned the book. His wife didn’t even know about it. Funeral planning may be my profession, but Ray was way ahead of me.

Planning your living funeral

There are many different ways you can host a living funeral. In fact, there’s really NO wrong way to do it. You can sneak it in, disguised as another type of event like Ray did, or you can call it exactly what it is–a chance to say goodbye and celebrate a life well lived.

A living funeral doesn’t have to replace a traditional funeral and it probably shouldn’t. They both serve separate purposes. Even after a great living funeral, there is still a need for ceremony, ritual, closure and to say one last goodbye. Ray died later that same year we had gathered for the birthday party, and he had a pretty good traditional funeral as well, although it was a lot sadder than the birthday party. After the funeral, we all went to the restaurant Ray had picked and he threw us one last party on him.

Timing is Everything
Timing is Everything

1. Choosing the right time. Choosing the right time to have a living funeral can be a little tricky. Ideally, you want the guest of honor to be healthy enough physically and mentally to understand and enjoy the event. However, you don’t want it to be like celebrity autobiographies, where you have a new one every five or ten years. If a person is old enough or infirm enough that his or her life expectancy is uncertain, celebrating now is a good idea.

2. Finding a good location. Like a wedding or a graduation party, you want to find a place that is meaningful to the guest of honor, can accommodate the number of people you expect to attend and be appropriate for the weather. Unlike traditional funerals, there are no taboos to living funeral locales. Beaches, amusement parks, theaters, ball parks, party centers, parks, even bars are all acceptable venues.

3. Who should officiate? If you are going to have a ceremony, where friends and family share their favorite stories about the guest of honor, you may want to have someone officiate to keep the pace going smoothly and to add some structure. Since a living funeral isn’t a church rite, you don’t have to have a priest, minister or rabbi (although you could.) One popular trend in living funerals is to hire a celebrant to officiate. In the popular vernacular, a celebrant is someone who following an interview process, writes and officiates at a non-religious funeral or memorial ceremonies. In most funerals that use a celebrant (instead of a member of the clergy), the emphasis of the ceremony is on the person, his or her life and his or her achievements without the scriptures, homilies and communion associated with a religious ceremony. Such a format is naturally well-suited for a living funeral.

4. Should you have a ceremony? The choice to have a formal ceremony at the living funeral is a personal one. The event can be a glorified party, as was Ray’s birthday bash, or be a more solemn affair, as you might have for an octogenarian like Morrie Schwartz, with friends and family members sharing their favorite memories and anecdotes. It’s unlikely that any two living funerals will ever be alike.

Funeral Food5. What about food? Food is optional at a living funeral, but sharing even desserts or a light meal can help to put people at ease. If you don’t want the expense of a caterer, it’s appropriate to ask those attending to bring a dish they’ve made for the guest of honor or to simply bake (or buy) a plate of cookies. Obviously, the time of year and the venue will also influence your decisions about food. “Breaking bread” is a time-honored way for friends and family to stay close.

6. Picking appropriate music. Music, too, is optional, but can I highly recommend it to help set the tone and mood of the event. Choosing the guest of honor’s favorite band or genre of music is never wrong. You can also bring in local musicians, such as a bluegrass trio or classical quartet. If you are having a formal ceremony, a soloist can be used to break up the speakers.

Some Ideas For Sharing Your Life

  • Things to put on display like: Photos or a memorial video with highlights of life, Family tree graphic, Diplomas, Awards or trophies, uniforms resumes and titles held.
  • Hobbies stuff, Sport memorabilia, Projects and creations like art.
  • Invitations, Who will officiate, Speakers, organizers, ushers, program handouts, musicians or DJ.
  • Decor, seating, tables, restrooms, parking, handicap access and assistance, the influence of weather on your selected location.

 

Getting started with your living funeral

Living FuneralYou don’t have to be a skilled party planner to organize an enjoyable and memorable living funeral. Increasingly, traditional funeral directors are offering these types of events as well as their traditional funeral services. Hospice facilities are also embracing the concept of living funerals as part of their breath of services that aid in the transition between life and death. Hospice workers know that terminal illnesses often isolate people from their usual social contacts and routines. A good ritual, especially one centered around that person like a living funeral, can help to shatter that isolated feeling. Far from being depressing, a living funeral can actually help a sick person feel more connected to his or her friends. Like any funeral or memorial, a living funeral is truly an unselfish gift that is very important to the one’s we love. This is also an opportunity to showcase your loves, frame your life and cement your legacy!

My friend Ray was the most generous and thoughtful person I have ever met. I am virtually certain that he had never heard the term “living funeral” when he planned his birthday party. However, he didn’t need to know about “living funerals” to know that he (and his friends) needed one. He just did what he always did and thought about the needs of the people closest to him. That was Ray, he had good instincts. I dedicate this article to my good friend Ray Sullivan… Miss You Buddy.