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Colorado Prison First to Have Hospice

When a guilty verdict is reached and someone is sent to prison, the outside world sometimes forgets them. This is especially true for those sentences that will last far beyond the life expectancy of the prisoner. Many will succumb to sickness and die either in their prison bunks or the prison hospital before their sentence ends. If they’re estranged from their families, they end up dying alone, with no one to comfort them or talk to them during their last days.

Colorado Territorial Correction Facilities is the first prison to have a hospice. It’s operated by inmates, who are trained in the basics and must help care for dying patients. For the caregivers, it can be a chance to find the redemption they’ve been seeking. For the prisoners, it’s a chance to have a meaningful connection in their last few days of life. It also helps lower costs, though in this case, the idea of a humane death supersedes cost cutting measures.

Hospice focuses on easing pain instead of trying for an impossible cure. When a person is dying due to disease or injury, the traditional response is to pump them full of medications or resort to surgery in order to try and extend their life, even if only for a few days. Hospice accepts death and focuses on the patient’s comfort by helping them prepare for the end stages of their life instead of trying to extend it a few more days.

The reality of death for most people is that they will live their last moments on a hospital bed while under the influence of various medications and attached to machines. Even if there is only a tiny chance that the doctors can fix the patient, they will try. The downside to this approach is that some medications (such as chemotherapy for cancer) can cause the patient tremendous amounts of pain. Unfortunately, going through this pain is no guarantee that the individual will survive. Sometimes, it’s the family members that are encouraging the patient to keep trying, inadvertently causing the patient more pain than necessary in search of an unlikely solution.

A hospice death is accepted as the natural end point to life. When someone is old or has a minimal chance to live, they may choose to accept death rather than fighting it. The hospice then focuses on comforting the patient and minimizing their pain through their last few days. With the knowledge that they don’t have a lot of time left, the patient can spend their last days focusing on what’s really important to them.

Hospice is seen as a graceful acceptance of mortality. The patient gets the opportunity to do things they couldn’t if they were stuck in a hospital bed. As a hospice focuses on comfort instead of a cure, the patient gets the opportunity to enjoy their last few days, whether that means brief walks outside, watching their favorite movies, or quiet time with family. They can make sure their will is prepared and share last words with those close to them rather than being hooked up to hospital machinery. Hospice will also have a caregiver that is able to attend to their needs when friends or family are unable to do so.

Hospice isn’t for everyone. Those who are young or have a good chance at survival shouldn’t select comfort over medical attention. A hospice is for those who’ve come to terms with their life, and recognize that since the odds are slim that they’ll survive, they should spend their last days or weeks living how they want to live, with those close to them, instead of being confined to a hospital bed away from their loved ones. They’re choosing to spend their last days in a quiet, dignified manner rather than fighting for a few extra hours.

For friends and family of the patient, hospice lets them see their loved one in a positive light, enjoying their remaining time. The environment is much warmer than that of a sterile hospital, and with more personalized caregivers they can get easier answers to their questions. Hospice caregivers will often start the inevitable conversation regarding funeral plans. Many state prisons now promote simple cremation services. Many patients report feeling a blanket of acceptance as they move on from our world. Accepting death allows the family members a chance to prepare and accept the inevitable, and also ease into the grieving process.
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We Can All Learn Something From Irish Funerals

There is something to be said for an Irish funeral, which is often referred to as a wake. More commonly a celebration, as opposed to a time of mourning, this type of service allows family and friends to become further involved in the planning process.

Prior to the mid 1900’s these events turned into large celebrations partly because men were not otherwise allowed to congregate, for fear of planning rebellion against the British government.

Until 15 or so years ago, Irish funeral ceremonies always took place in the home. Today, many are held in a different location such as a garden or country club setting. Locale is typically based on something or someplace the departed enjoyed.

An old-fashioned Irish funeral was looked upon as a social event, which could last as long as three days. The premise was not to leave the decedent alone, during that time. The term “wake” was used due to the fact that family members stayed with the body at night, making sure its spirit didn’t come back to life and evil spirits didn’t try to claim it.

A window was opened as soon as the person died. The body was dressed in dark clothing or covered with a white shroud and placed on a bed or in a coffin. No embalming was necessary. Candles were placed above the decedent’s head and boots were placed at his or her feet, in effort to make the journey through purgatory easier. Out of respect, clocks were stopped and blankets were placed over mirrors.

There was and still is plenty of food and drink (usually Irish whiskey and Beer) at an Irish funeral. There is also music (bagpipes), dancing and games. When any type of card game is played, it is customary to deal an extra hand for the person whose life is being celebrated. Contests of strength sometimes occur as well.

“Keening,” the Irish term for a display of sorrow, is an old tradition that still takes place at some wakes. Professional mourners are hired to do things like wail, cry and even recite poetry.

A pipe of tobacco is passed around as a means to assist the spirit of the loved one on his heavenly journey. Each person who smokes the pipe is encouraged to share a bit of wit and wisdom with the crowd.

On the one month anniversary of the wake, a “month’s mind” is held in a church to again celebrate the life of the person who died. A yearly mass is held as well.

In modern day USA families are getting more involved in planning and participating more in caring for their own dead. Home funeral are more common than they were 20 years ago. Baby boomers are not wanting services on thousand year old impersonal ceremonies. Because many are now choosing cremation services there is the freedom of more time for families to plan a more detailed and personalized memorial gathering.

More American families are now choosing to work with a funeral celebrant, when it comes to the details of the actual funeral ceremony or service. A celebrant is extremely versed in all aspects of a funeral. This includes everything from funeral history to the funeral rituals of many cultures. He or she can perform tasks like writing the perfect eulogy, offering advice in ritual and customs that may suit the individual needs of each family. Unlike clergy, celebrants are more open to handling families with multiple cultures and religions that are found in much of society today.

Celebrants take the time it takes to get an in-depth look into the life of the person they are memorializing. This information, coupled with things like the rest of the family’s personal values and religious beliefs, tend to make it a much more meaningful funeral ceremonies. The funeral home staff can often recommend a local celebrant or you can contact the Celebrant Foundation and Institute to find a celebrant near you.

Unfortunately, a traditional funeral service doesn’t always pay an adequate tribute to a loved one. With the help of a celebrant, that is never the case. Opting for an end-of-life ceremony, as opposed to a standard funeral, allows family members and friends to remember by way of stories and objects which truly define the departed.

Irish Cremation Products — Irish Funeral Products from therishwake.com

Yes, there is a lot to be learned from Irish funerals. They are celebrations of life and love, meant to make the initial mourning process and the overall healing process a little easier.

To learn more about how to plan an Irish wake click here and visit My Sendoff.com

To see some products designed with the Irish in mind visit “The Irish Wake”.com
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Cremation is The Only Cure for Doctor Oz Diet Gone Wrong

SACRAMENTO, CA — According to eyewitness accounts from Sutter Memorial’s emergency room patients, Joshua Hayes, 30, stumbled through the hospital’s entryway and his distended abdomen violently burst open. Scene investigators discovered the food to entrails ratio to be remarkably high, which prompted in-depth but expedited analysis. The lab results showed the contents that exploded from Hayes’ stomach precisely matched the recommended diets discussed by Doctor Oz’s television program, website and daily emails. More specifically, the contents contained all the recommended diets.

Dr Oz Diet Exposed — Now Known As Dr. Oz Syndrome!

Flesh, blood and Doctor Oz’s miracle foods and vitamin supplements covered nearly everyone who was in the waiting room during the time of the incredible human explosion, provoking melodramatic reactions from a majority of the emergency room patients. Head Nurse Michelle Sanders said, “I’ve never seen anything like this in all my 30-something years of nursing. The smell of acai berries, green detox ozz, humus and raspberries key tones is almost as intense as actually seeing that hunk of small intestine clinging to a wall. This emergency room looks like a combination of the ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ combined with a farmers’ market.”

Hayes’ widowed and freshly single nubile wife Natalie, 28, was in the process of parking the couple’s car when the abdominal explosion occurred. However, even though she did not see her husband’s spontaneous combustion, she claimed to be sad about the situation.

When asked why her husband would have so thoroughly gorged himself on so much of Doctor Oz’s recommended diet foods in such a short period, she said, “Josh was always at the pinnacle of health. He worked out constantly and always ate well by avoiding fast food, snacks, sodas… all that stuff. I had been taking the Dr. Oz coffee bean extract and aside from the constant diarrhea and vomiting the magic elixir made my hot little body even hotter! Josh was impressed and he then discovered Doctor Oz’s various suggestions for dieting, he lost control of his ability to separate beneficial claims from reality.”

Ms. Hayes added, “He said he wanted to get every health benefit from Doctor Oz’s diets, and over the course of the first few days on the diet he ate, quite literally, everything Oz had ever discussed diet wise.”

Upon being asked whether or not she feels ready to get back into the dating game, she said that the question was extremely inappropriate and offensive; however, her body language said differently, which was evident to this reporter in between her loud sobbing and skyward questioning, asking her deity, “Why did you have to take Joshua like this?” Neither Doctor Oz nor Ms. Hayes’ chosen deity could be reached for comment.

Cremation Casket — Funeral Director Agreed That it Was A Nice Box and eventually gave it to her for free

Mrs. Hayes claimed to have an close relationship with the local funeral director and needed to now go see him about arranging for a cremation service. She said she figured that since only half of her late husband’s remains were recoverable she would be able to persuade her funeral director friend that it should be a low cost cremation service.
(Pictured Right) Mrs Hayes checks the fine detail on a cremation casket. Due to tragic circumstances the stand up funeral director donated this beautiful box.

She even said she should be able to use a smaller cremation urn to hold his ashes because there would be less of him. She thought perhaps cremation urns for pet ashes would be big enough, adding that a cremation urn for dogs might be appropriate for Josh and that she would scatter the ashes where they first met at his favorite strip club.

When leaving the funeral home Ms. Hayes maintained her fake position on dating while walking to her vehicle. Additionally, she would not answer the door that evening for this reporter, who was looking for more elaboration on how she wanted to go about dating. She was definitely home, two lights were visible in the dark of the evening: one visible in the front of the house and the other visible from some manzanita bushes in her backyard.

Every door in Ms. Hayes’ Sacramento home was locked, and all the bottom floor windows were closed as well. Although there was an open window on the second floor, there were not immediately available climbable items to facilitate entering the home and obtaining further interview answers.
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Another Beautiful Ash Scattering in The Holy Land

As cremations service continue to rise, Ash scatterings are becoming very popular. Many of your clients will do ash scatterings, and they need options. Tying into this market can produce a rewarding income stream for you.

A Scattering Service is not as simple as it may seem. There are many considerations to doing it properly and professionally. In our industry, you only get one chance to do it right. Clients demand top service.

We specialize in scattering cremation services and have one of the best scattering locations in the world. Your clients will appreciate our professionalism and first-class approach to scattering. We are the best at what we do; you and your clients will appreciate the exceptional service and attention we give you.

This is a partnership. Simply suggest us to your client during the funeral planning and we will take care of the rest. They will be extremely satisfied with the recommendation you gave them. And we will compensate you a handsome commission for each referral.

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Holyland Ash Scattering .COM — Learn More Click Here

Face Booking to The Death

Death on Facebook — Is Facebook The New Cemetery?

In the age of social media, the death of a Face Book user presents several concerns. The proper etiquette has not been yet established and leaves friends and family members questioning what the proper approach is. As the Face Book is accessible around the world, the phenomenon occurs all over the globe. According to Huffington Post, 30 million people who opened Face Book accounts have since past away.

The profile of abandoned accounts can be approached by several methods.
• The death is never reported to Face Book, and the account remains open, therefore available to post comments, ads and photo tags.
• The account can be switched to “memorial page” once the death is reported to Face Book staff. Local obituary or death certificate is required for the account to be switched to a different timeline.
• Immediate family members are able to file a petition to close the account, but will be required to forward a proof of relationship with the deceased.
• Court appointed access may be granted to continue the account allowing the members to post condolences, pictures and comments about the life of the diseased in a tasteful manner.

In 2009, Face Book revised its policy about the deceased members and allows the family, colleagues and friends to interact with the page as if it was active. However, the feature of public search is deactivated and only available to existing Face Book participants. The memories can be shared, and the comments in regards to past posts can be addressed.

If the individual’s page has to be memorialized, the existing members will not be able to leave messages other then condolences and comments. The automated app activity will also be disconnected. All inappropriate content will be removed, and status updates of sensitive nature may be deleted at the discretion of the Face Book staff.

If close family members choose to deactivate the profile of the diseased, the Face Book will most likely comply and honor the request. However, many family members choose to keep the profile as an online headstone where all people who were associated with the deceased can still visit and interact by posting their comments. Many Face Book members often share their private lives with the world, and their profile serves as a testament of their life’s accomplishments. Existing members can visit and pay tribute to the person they used to admire, love and stay in constant contact with.

For many people, Face Book has become a vehicle to vent their feelings and interact without the actual personal contact. The safety of the Internet allows the individuals to express their true feeling and grieve when their admired friends demise. It also allows the existing members to connect with each other and share their grief, life experiences and memories connected to the deceased. If the page remains unchanged, the profile may appear in Sponsored Stories and Face Book Suggestions creating painful remainders that the owner of the profile is no longer among the living. As the birthdays reappear annually, people send birthday wishes unaware the member has passed on.

Digital cemeteries are built around the memories of cherished loved ones. Face Book has become a natural way for people to grieve and keep the identity of a deceased person alive. The virtual space allows other people to show how deeply they are affected. However, may people feel that once the individual is gone, the Face Book profile should be deleted permanently not allowing anybody to display their emotions. The topic is highly subjective and delicate, and it is creating controversy among all users of the Face Book world. For many people, social network is a comfortable way to express their feelings while others find it distasteful and disrespectful.

Methods of mourning greatly differ across many cultures. What seems appropriate to some individuals may not be accepted by others. Expression of grief is highly personal, and it may be displayed differently in cyber society and physical world. Some users mistake the Face Book for the real grief counseling and try to deal with the loss of a loved one in their own way by showing their denial or depression on the pages of the Internet. They also look for confirmation of their grief from other members.

As the subject remains extremely controversial, legal battles have taken place to access the profiles of the deceased in search of answers. In the U.S., the laws greatly vary from state to state. Property rights without any physical substance are difficult to transfer as the legal system is still in its infancy stages of determining such transfers. The Face Book policy clearly states that the accounts cannot be transferred without a written permission. Transferring the account to the next of kin still remains an unsolved mystery.

The copyright laws and inconsistent state laws make the transfer of a Face Book account to a descendant difficult. In some cases the access is granted. The terms of service are not specific and confusion still exists as some of the Face Book accounts contain sensitive information and data. Digital legacy management agencies have been created to aid with the issue. Members can create emails to be delivered upon their demise and can designate recipients of their choice. Online arrangements and cremation services may be also included in addition to funeral planning.

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Answering The Call

One Call Make it Count!

Funeral Home Shopper Call

Secure the shopper to secure the call!! Consider the shopper your opportunity of the day and get ready to shine. Remember this could be your only chance and what you say and how you say it can make ALL the difference. The only reason they are calling is because a death has occurred or is imminent and they have not yet made a decision of which funeral home they will use.

I don't care about your coach !

The average phone shopper:

Does not want to “Shop Around”
Does not have time to personally visit funeral homes
Does not know what to ask or why
Knows nothing about your exceptional services and caring professionalism
Needs information and has only time to talk with you once.

Answering the Call

You should have a standard answer and include a “buffer”. The caller won’t hear it but they will hear what comes next, the name of the funeral home. Anything you say after your name erases your name.
Don’t sound rushed. Get warm and fuzzy so you can establish a trusting voice.
Always have your first call form handy or pen and paper, so you don’t have make the caller wait as well as sound unorganized. Write the information down as you hear it, so you don’t have to ask questions when the info was already given. Having to ask again lets them know you really weren’t listening.
Speak in the present tense. As in does (not did) your husband have a pacemaker. What is (not what was) your husband’s name. What is the name of your husband’s doctor.
Use simple plain language. Everyone who answers for the funeral home needs to be on the same page, speak professional, soft and not scary or panicky. Laundry gets picked up. People get taken into your care!

First establish the nature of the call

Caller: How much is a cremation service. Answer: Has a death occurred? Now you have a better idea of how to respond more accurately. At need has a different style of call then pre-need.
Take Charge of the Call. Whoever is answering your phone should have full knowledge of your services and prices so they can paint a positive picture of your firm and the services you offer. Establish authority and show that you are an expert in your field. Serve the caller……get the shopper!
Remember

You may be the first place the Caller calls and you may not be the last, but you CAN be the best.
They don’t even know what to ask, so guide them with your own pointed questions or you could be in for a very long and confusing call.
The Caller could be in a hospital, at a crime scene, in a nursing home with no holding and may be in a rush. They may not want a conversation, just answers, so feel them out and don’t assume anything.
The Caller has no idea what a funeral home does or why they do it. They don’t know what they are paying for and they don’t know what they need.
Educate the Caller and give them the information they ask for. Don’t read a menu of packages and prices. Give them the information they need to make a choice in funeral homes, the rest of the information you can get at the arrangement conference.
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